MY JOURNEY OF GROWTH: MY BIRTHDAY STORY TO MY WORLD

This has been part of my journey of human growth, it has not been a smooth road, and am yet to complete the journey, am still learning and am also still growing. There are many bumps on the way in the name of conflicts, disappointments, doubts, uncertainty and many more. But we cannot stop on the way even when we are faced with the most heart breaking and tearing conflicts, we need to learn how to resolve them and move on with life.

Some time back I could not be able to forgive and forget, I really could not figure out that healing my past pain is also a process that I need to take step by step. Finally, I have to gratefully appreciate the role of spirituality and christianity in my entire life.

My goal in life is to be in a position to be able to deal with different circumstances in an understanding way. I have a desire to be able to incooperate different contradicting human behaviurs in an appreciating way knowing that though human beings are the same, they are as well different and are supposed to be handled in a way that accomodates them without judging or looking at them with an expectation too high beyond their ability to change.

My goal here is from a wide range of ideas and ideals. Dynamic of human growth is a strong pillar that I have depended on for a lot of support in life, it has helped me to appreciate the fact that maturity is a process that has no measure because it varies from person to person. There are people who will grow faster and others slowly. Human beings are social beings that need each other both to grow and to live. There are different levels of learning that make up wisdom needed by an individual to fully grow and develop, in order for one to grow fully, there is need to have a combinations of all the different levels of learning. The levels are; physiological, psychosocial and rational/spiritual realms.

These are said to be connected to the different human needs which are necessary for any perosn to grow and also to develop. The most important ones are the need for affiliation and the need for autonomous. I have moments when I really need company but at times I change and desire to be independent. But I do not overlook one at the expence of the other. I do my best to integrate these by making a choice to change my attitude(s) in life I have come to reflect on my personal values and learnt that I dont have to handle any issues in life with prejudice. I have come to also appreciate this because it is very clear that there are a lot of facts about being an open minded person and also being ready to learn, to change and hence to grow.

From the paiget's theory of moral development, I have leanrt that for me as a person to grow, there are three domains that I can learn things from; cognitive, behaviour and emotional. Before, I only noticed the knowledge I got cognitively, but now I know that from both my behaviour and people's behaviours and from my emotions and people's emotions, I can learn a lot. In the first place it sounded void but with practice and reflection in my life I have come to believe that alongside my cognitive, they are aspects that form who I am. Now I have a strong conviction that not only me but anyone else can change and become what they really desire to be in life.

The humanistic theory has opened my eyes in this as well. It talks of people having unique qualities which will enanble me to be what I wish to be. This has helped me to avoid/stop having an attitude of feeling better than others or others being better than me. It has helped me to do away with the thought of feeling unfit or less of a perfomer. I have instead come to learn that there are areas in life which I can perfom very well because am gifted.

I once had a strong feeling that my life should and must be happy, perfect and complete, this was challenged when I learnt that stress is good and also necessary in life. But at the same time, I have to be cautious not to suffer from distress which can extend the negative results to my other body functions. This may be due to poor communication between me and the person that I feel is responsible for hurting me. There maybe a barrier to communication which may result in my mis-understanding the other party resulting in my mis-interpretation thus getting stressed over minor issues which can be solved through dialogue. But, by the fact that communication is irreversible, I have also leanrt that I need to be very careful with how I talk to people whther I am annoyed or not because later on/afterwards I will not be able to undo the wrong/hurting words that I will have passed to someone else. This is because even if a apologize, I will not be able to make the person to fully/completely forget my careless words.

This is achievable, not by waiting for the other person to act but by myslef doing something about it through the motivation of my desire to be a leader whose call is to heal and not to wound others. Not by lording over others but giving them a chance to grow and appreciate life to the fullest.

One great thing I have also learnt is to see the aspect of spirituality in my psychosexual life by appreciating my sexual feelings and also knowing that they should be expressed in a way of showing respect both to me and also my partner. I also appreciate the role of spirituality in healing painful experiences where I am reminded to turn to God in prayer and to remember that God loves me and He knows what I am going through.

The most important linkage I have come to discover is the linkage between faith and psychology. This is because as much as I would wish to study and understand the Bible thoroughly, I need a psychological approach to do that. I really have leanrt a lot in life that will help me to live in peace with myself and others.